Break ups suck. In a planet of 7 billion + people this is one of those commonly shared undertakings that any living person experience at some point or another in life. I bet you have been there too. It's a marvel to think we are all in the same boat...
They say break up is one of the most common social stressor in adult life, though some of us started already in first grade. Yours truly experience dates back to good old teenage time and ever since I have collected some pretty unorthodox stories on the subject. The best of all them was when my Basque boyfriend of the time bothered to dump me on the phone lecturing me on how his shrink explained him that intimate relationships harm the search of self - whatever that meant. So while he hung up to look for his super ego, he left me dealing with my destroyed ego. How sensible of him.
In my family we have a good-track record of megalomaniac divorces. They all involved, to different degrees, hire expensive private detectives, even more expensive lawyers, sudden change door locks, stealing credit card bills and mobile phones in search for proves, fights for properties, children, pets and everything else including that old plate that nobody would like to keep in normal circumstances. Most of those behaviors were hysteric and in retrospective I tend to doubt about their legality.
Once my mum was even called to testify in front of the Sacred Roman Rota, the highest tribunal of the Roman Catholic Church , in a legal procedure aiming at declaring one of our family members' marriage null and void. I wasn't asked to testify as my family thought that my poor relationship with God would have mislead the judge. What a pity.
Those dramas usually involved the whole extended family, friends and neighbors (poor them, they usually witnessed the worst) - I guess you have this compulsive necessity to air your dirty laundry with the rest of the world if you come from Southern Europe. So as I grew up, the War of the Roses didn't seem to me such a bitter divorce after all.
Ultimately the most unbelievable stories come always from my expat friends. If Carry Bradshaw was dumped with a post it, my friends experienced some of the following:
1) Being asked for a divorce in a e-mail (Subject: a wife's duty)
2) Discover your husband, father of your 4 sons, for whom you have been paying the bills for a decade, is cheating on you with a 20 something Asian friend.
3) Being left with a "it's over" text, on the day of your birthday
4) Discover your girlfriend is leaving you for your roommate and best friend.
5) Being told your sexual performances do not fulfill an average woman's needs.
6) Realizing you are not in a relationship anymore when your calls/emails/texts are not returned and the concierge is refusing allowing you in the building -even just to ask for an explanation (Madam you are persona non grata)
7) Leaving your country and moving to a tiny village in the Flanders with your teenager daughter just to be told after 2 months that this relationship is not gonna work.
So as I said at the beginning, break ups suck and they make me sick. If you are currently experiencing this, I have no recommendations but a whole lot of empathy. Someone once told me that love is not a communicable disease and no, you are not gonna die for it. Yes...you tell my friends....
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